Do you ever have times when you just feel defeated? You try this or that to only end up disappointed and disheartened? It happens to everyone.
I’ve been tasting the bitterness of disappointed hopes lately with my recovery. I’ve tried new tasks I think I can handle just to end up once again taking two steps back. These were simple things like climbing stairs, or household chores, things that used to come easily but are now difficult and frustrating, resulting in nausea and fatigue.
That’s the physical struggle, but then there’s the spiritual struggle which accompanies the physical struggle because we are all connected: soul, body, spirit.
In her book ‘Beauty Marks’, Linda Barrick explains the difference between our bodies, souls and spirits like this:
Body: physiological, sense awareness, sight, hearing, smell, taste, touch.
Soul: psychological, self-awareness, mind, will, emotions.
Spirit: Spiritual, God awareness, Conscience, faith, worship, dwelling place of the Holy Spirit.
Just like God is Triune meaning three Persons in One, our bodies are so intricately designed that we can’t separate our broken bodies from our emotions and spirits. When the emotions go low so does our energy levels, and the pain seems to flare up or vice versa.
I’m unable to attend church or listen to sermons online because the sound negatively effects my nerves. Last week I tried reading a sermon on my iPhone (the print was super small) and it resulted in eye strain that left me cross-eyed and hypersensitive to light for days. I severely felt the spiritual battle for my soul just then.
I find it easy to feel discouraged but then God is teaching me to find the grace to carry on while healing from this brain injury and that grace comes from Him alone. We CAN ‘stand’ emotionally, physically, and spiritually by the power of Christ who is our Victor in every battle we face.
My copy of the hymn I rescued after a friend’s boy made it into a paper airplane.
The other day, my 12 year old son was listening to the hymn ‘In Christ Alone’ and the power of the lyrics struck me. We can only stand against the wiles of the Evil One undefeated by Christ’s strength alone. We will never face spiritual defeat because Christ has already claimed our victory in the fight by His victory over sin, death and separation from Himself through His triumphant work on the cross.
Only by Christ’s strength alone, will the fight gain a winning outcome but it won’t be easy. Christ has promised to carry us true but the battle is hard.
The lie that we can overcome spiritual battles by our own tactics is dangerous. The minute we think we are spiritual giants and can handle the world and sin on our own is precisely the minute we must get to God for help.
He doesn’t ask us to fight them alone. He knows how much we need Him and He is faithful in helping us when we seek Him for it.
He understands our physical limitations or weaknesses and can give us physical strength entirely sourced from Him. He can also heal our emotions and I believe as my body heals, my emotions will too. They’ve come a long way and God is gluing my shattered pieces back together again with hope.
The other day I was resting with closed eyes in my sofa chair and it hit me. While I don’t know exactly what is occurring with all the physical changes in my body that are scary, painful and hard, my spirit is directly connected to God who does KNOW. My comfort is this: Resting and trusting in the One who knows every detail of my life and believing that He will heal, and carry my body, soul and spirit to the very end. It gives me a lot of hope to stand in His strength alone and trust him.
Psalm 18:35 King James Version (KJV)
35 Thou hast also given me the shield of thy salvation: and thy right hand hath holden me up, and thy gentleness hath made me great.
Psalm 44:8 King James Version (KJV)
8 In God we boast all the day long, and praise thy name for ever. Selah.
Psalm 20:7-8 King James Version (KJV)
7 Some trust in chariots, and some in horses: but we will remember the name of the Lord our God.
8 They are brought down and fallen: but we are risen, and stand upright.
1 Corinthians 15:57 King James Version (KJV)
57 But thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
2 Corinthians 2:14 King James Version (KJV)
14 Now thanks be unto God, which always causeth us to triumph in Christ, and maketh manifest the savour of his knowledge by us in every place.
Here are the lyrics to ‘ In Christ Alone’.