March is brain injury awareness month. Fitting because this past March my TBI took a critical turn for the worse leaving me unable to walk very well, weak, and in more pain than my body was accustomed to.
My downward spiral actually began with the stress I had thrown at me last fall when my life got put back into the instability of job loss.
With the stress and worry of where would our money come from, I chose to play mommy martyr and carelessly went off my blood sugar supplements (chromium) and muscle strengthening potassium in order to save money. Bad idea….
In mid-February our neighbor decided to clear a large amount of acreage directly across the street from our house and for 5 weeks planted a massive chipper about 50 yards from my front door. The noise was so loud that at times it shook the house.
My nervous system became overloaded and my brain went berserk. The hypothalamus gland is located right where my injury is. This section of the brain regulates blood sugar. I could not get it under control. For weeks my body woke me up at night every two hours, sweating, heart racing, and crying out for food.
I then became unable to sleep.
Psalm 119:73a, “Thy hands have made me and fashioned me…”
Looking back I should have tried to go stay with a relative but by the time I was in trouble, I was way too weak to leave the house.
When we got my blood sugar stable my brain was so confused as to how to function it continued to keep me awake thinking I still needed to eat. I couldn’t recover because my nervous system (now in a dangerous overloaded mode) kept me awake sometimes for 2 days at a time and couldn’t calm down.
Brain injury is no picnic!
Because of the damage to my 10th cranial nerve, the vagus nerve, which is a parasympathetic nerve, my mouth had stopped producing saliva which made eating extremely difficult along with an upset stomach from the noise. This was hard because I needed to eat to stabilize my blood sugar but with a dry mouth I just couldn’t. Finally, once I started eating and sleeping again my body was able to begin to heal.
That’s when my legs went.
Unfortunately, my legs took a beating from the ordeal which caused my peripheral nervous system (branches out from the spine or CNS) to become damaged. The issues from my blood sugar instability was certainly a contributor to the nerve damage. My Dr. has said it may take 6-12 months for the nerves in my legs to heal. That prognosis feels like bad news but it’s not really because at least I will heal right?
My husband has found a new temp job and seems to like it well enough. We pray the company hires him on soon so he can receive good pay and health benefits.
God is still in control.
So, that sums up my “upheaval in March” as I now refer to it as and as I wait for my legs to heal I’m reminded that God only sends us trials in love. This ordeal I do believe was sent to test me. Am I going to give up? Or am I going to continue to trust the God I love knowing He is good no matter what happens to my life? I’m in His care and He will make perfect all those things which concern me (Psalm 138:8). He sees the future. I refuse to believe my decline was a random act of chance. God’s sovereign hand allowed every detail of my set back for a reason. He knows my lot. He knows what I need spiritually and physically. He’s in control of my health, and finances. He is to be trusted.
TBI is like a roller coaster ride with ups that creak along slowly, peaking for just a short time, then crashing down so fast all you can do is trust in God as you hang on and scream….weeeee!
The comfort of it is that Jesus is sitting alongside of you in that roller coaster car and you’re never ever alone. π’
Much love,
Viv π
Wow.
I admire you, Viv. Love ya. β€
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Thanks sweet Lydia! Love you too!β€
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This was definitely an upheaval in March, Viv. You had a lot of stairs to climb in your body – whew! Iβm so thankful that Abba gave you the grace and the courage to make it through each and every hurdle.
I admire very much how you have found a way through Holy Spirit to find comfort in the scripture. I believe it is that bedrock that helps you (and us) to get through each and every challenge.
I also love the reminder that every test, every challenge, every set back, every disappointment, every ache and pain – has not gone unnoticed by our Sovereign Lord. Hallelujah!!
My love and prayers are with you (and hubby for a permanent job) continuously. β€οΈ
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Dee, it was the scriptures I have memorized over the years that really, really kicked in and gave me the courage to persevere. At times I was too weak to open my Bible but the Holy Spirit brought them to mind every time along with hymns I’d sung as a child.
Yes, every trial is part of the plan for molding and shaping us to be more like Him.
Awwwww, I cherish those prayers. Love you so much! β€π€
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Bless the Lord Jesus Christ! Thank You Lord for Holy Spirit who has kept Your promise to bring things back to our memory.
Hallelujah!
Love you backπ
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Praise Him!!β€β€π€
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ππΎππ½
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Praise the wonderful name of Jesus! Holy Spirit has kept Jesusβ promise in bringing to memory all we have studied. Hallelujah!
Iβm so thankful when you could commit to memory, you did. A lesson for us all.
Love you back β€οΈ
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Love you dearest Dee!!β€β€
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β€οΈβ€οΈ
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Nothing like a classic hymn to bring things back into perspective. (Did you ever wake up with one going through your head? I had a counselor who told me that was my spirit singing. β€ )
I can relate to being happy recovery could take 6-12 months. It's so much better than hearing that awful phrase "possibly permanent," right?
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Oh yes, that is the Holy Spirit comforting us!π
I’m thankful you brought this up. I didn’t get much feedback about the 6-12 month recovery so I’m blessed you mentioned it. True much better than, permanent. Much.
God bless you for reading, it means a lot! πβ€π»
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I am sending you so much love and lots of gentle hugs and prayers for you. Please know that I wish I was there to help you out! I know this sounds weird but are you able to wear headphones? Some headphones are noise cancelling.
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Thanks sweet Wendi! Oh, that would be awesome!!! But, just knowing you pray gives me courage to push on through.
I wear the vibes but during the upheaval they didn’t help. My hubby gave me his shooting headphones which squashed my head in so bad I couldn’t keep them on. And they didn’t drown out all the noise either. I do think cancelling out plugs may help. Complete silence!
β€β€βΊ
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Oh Vivian………..please know that I am sending you love and light and hugs and prayers…….thank you so very much for letter and you will be hearing from me soon! π
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Oh yay! I’m thankful it arrived and am so blessed by your love and prayers!! Big hugs back and know we pray daily for you also. β€β€πΌπ»
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Oh Vivian, the thought that you would pray for me is so humbling, thank you! π
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Goodness precious friend, of course I pray. I know your condition mimicks mine and it’s hard.β€ππ
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it is very hard and thank you for saying this…….sometimes it helps to know that someone else gets it, even though I wished you had NO idea what it was like to live this way. You are a precious soul my dear!
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Dear Vivian, sending you some love, hugs and keeping you in my prayers. May the Lords healing hand be upon you.
I pray for your husband to get a permanent Job.
You root yourselves in scripture and cling to the Lord in difficult times and that is a powerful testimony.
May the Lord wrap you in His arms and may you feel His presence in a powerful way.
God bless you π€π.
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Dear Manu, I appreciate your love and prayers! Yes, my husband has really been through it too….in a different way but his trial of providing for us I’ve heard is tough on a guy.
Much love dear sister! God bless you always!β€π€π»
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You are such an inspiration and I know you will continue to trust in Him no matter what the testing…I am so sorry you have gone through this but I admire your faithfulness to Himβ€οΈ…Others are getting to see your faith through your words, such a wonderful blessing!!
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Praise God dear Alicia! If it weren’t for His grace, I would not have or will not make it. It’s too hard.
I hope others will come to know and love Him through this blog.
Much love dear one!β€
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Yes most definitely!! Take care sweet lady!!
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Thank you and take care of you too. Big hugs!β€π€β€π
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I so hate to hear what you have been going through, but I’m thankful that you share it and your strong faith. You encourage my heart sis. Praying for your continued healing and all that you and your family need. Keep going and keep trusting! You’re doing amazing. β€ β€ β€
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Awwww dear sister Tina! I’m so encouraged by your loving support and comment! Words to encourage are huge for me! Thank you for praying for us! The whole family has taken a hard hit from this but God is upholding us with His righteous right hand. β€β€β€π€π€π€π€
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β€ β€ β€
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I wish there was a magic wand I could wave your way but my prayers, which are much better , will have to do. And God will do His thing ,,,in His time. Hang in there ..you are a brave child of our Abba Father.
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Awwwww, my daughter actually made a Harry Potter wand once! We haven’t tried it!ππ€£π
Thank you for praying dearest Beverley! You are right in saying that God will do “His thing, in His time.” That’s so true and a comfort because His power is perfected in our weakness. Love you.β€β€π»
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I am praying for you and your family Vivian. I’m so sorry you have suffered like that. I pray the Lord moves in power and pours out healing into your body! God bless you and your family!
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Brother Ryan, my kids and I continue to pray for you as well. Although God says these sufferings are only light and momentary in the space of eternity, it is a struggle to not get trapped in thinking the pain will never end. But we KNOW it will!! ππ»
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Viv, you are an AMAZING warrior in and for Christ. I admire you! Love and prayers!
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Awwwww!! Love and hugs back sweet Mandy! God bless you always!β€β€π€π€
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God sends us trials in love, wow, that’s power, Viv!!! β€ Continued prayers!
We are at another financial issue coming up, and my husband will finish schooling soon. It's nerve wrecking to think about, and I'm working on laying it at His feet. To keep walking forward. Thank you for sharing. β€
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Thank you for your comment and prayers dear TR! I will certainly pray for your financial issues too. I know how hard it is as wives to see how hard our husbands are trying to make ends meet but coming up short every month. The list of needs just grows longer too. Laying it on the foot of the cross is best for it’s far to big a load for us to carry.
Much love TR!β€β€β€π»
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Amen! Thank you!!
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β€π€
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Oh, my! What a testimony you have! Thank you for blessing my socks off with your faithfulness to your Lord and Savior. Your Scripture memorization and the hymns – such a comfort, and what a strong witness to God’s power in your life.
Thank you so much for posting. This is powerful.
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Wow Kathy! It makes the pain worth it to be able to share the goodness of God with others. God is so Faithful and His love amazes me daily. The last time (in 2016/2017) when I went down was a dark, depressing time for me but now, after it happened again…..I feel joyful! That’s a God thing!! Hugs!π»β€π€
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Praise God for His joy!! π€π
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Much love dear Vivian and you are always in my prayers whether I see you everyday or not you are always in my prayers π LORD, thank You for Vivian. π
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Much love dearest Margaret! You are always in my thoughts and prayers too. I thank God for you dear lady and for your caring heart! Big hugs!! β€βΊπ€
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Youβre an inspiration to me Vivian! Your testimony here reminds me that the Lord is faithful to be with us through it all. Iβm glad youβre on the road to healing and that your husband has a temp job. I pray he gets hired on permanently. ππΏ Iβve gotten several of my permanent jobs by starting as a temp. May the Lord bless and keep you. β€οΈ
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That’s so encouraging Dawn! We find in our area, it’s hard to find work without going through a temp due to the University (LU). And so many living here, or wanting to. God bless you always dear friend!! β€β€
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I actually had applied to LU once, but I decided to attend Regent instead. I hope something works out for him soon. π€π
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Thanks for sharing, Viv. You are an inspiration and beloved by God! β₯
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Oh my goodness Lily, I feel exactly the same about You! Your courage inspires me daily!!β€π»
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Reading this both hurts and encourages me. I’m so sorry you’ve been struggling so much, but your faith is inspiring to me. Thank you for continuing to be such a beautiful example of faith in God!
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Dear Rebekah, I’m deeply touched by your compassion and thrilled you’ve gained some encouragement by this post. I continue to pray for you as you heal and rest in Him. β€
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You are so STRONG my friend! Iβm glad you are getting better little by little! Still praying for you! Much love! π
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Awww, that means so much Renee! Big hugs to you!β€
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Wow. I pray that you will be completely healed and made every bit whole and well!
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Thanks so much for the prayers!
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π
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With all of the upheaval from Covid, economic trials, and social injustice in the world, I have been guilty of focusing my prayers around these core issues. I need to begin praying more for other needs such as yours. I appreciate you sharing. Vivian, you are in the prayers of many. God is walking with you and so many others.
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I deeply appreciate your prayers Richard. It’s humbling to have others pray for me when the world is so much in turmoil. This comment comforts and encourages me as my pain levels are up today. Bless you Brother. βΊ
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God bless you, Vivian. You are a powerful witness for Christ! Thank you so much for sharing so openly and honestly. I have been praying for you. The Holy Spirit keeps bringing you to my mind.
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Bill, this comment means the world to me. I admire your perseverance and witness for Jesus so much. This comment comforts me as our Holy Spirit is using it too, just now, to strengthen my heart. Your life inspires me every day. I want to send you and Mary a card. vivianjs@juno.com if you can please send your address, or right here if it’s easier and I’ll copy it down then delete for privacy. God bless you!!βΊπ»
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Reblogged this on BASIC CHRISTIANITY (even for "Spiritual Dummies") and commented:
http://www.facebook.com/livingwithheadinjury
http://www.headbraininjury.wordpress.com
http://www.traumaticbraininjurytbi.wordpress.com
https://headinjurytbi.wordpress.com/
https://livingwithheadinjury.wordpress.com/
http://www.livingwithheadbraininjury.wordpress.com
https://thenurseanewbook.wordpress.com
and
https://anoneextraordinarylife.wordpress.com/
We share what we know, so that we all may grow.β
βKnowledge is the gateway to understandingβ¦and understanding is the gateway to a better life.β
β Jeff Sebell
Shining a light of hope in the darkest corners
Helping promote better understanding and awareness of what is often termed βThe Silent Epidemicβ (and/or βThe Hidden Handicapβ)
βInform, educate, inspireβ
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Thanks Craig! Thinking of you!!!
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thanks and “hang in there”, Vivian
https://theprophetandprayerwarrior.wordpress.com/2020/07/08/100-angels/
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You too!! I often think of your postive attitude in all this, and it pushes me forward in HOPE.
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Wow. That is indeed a lot. But I am glad you are holding on to God in the midst of it all. He is our Lot indeed just as David says in Psalms 16. You are loved and I admire your courage too. Stay great and He cares always. β€
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Thank you so much for pointing me to that Psalm! I will go read it now. Thank you for your comment and may God bless you always!β€β€
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Sorry you’ve had such a rough time of it. Praise God the upheaval is not permanent and that He provides for your needs! Praying with you about your husband’s job.
I have dry mouth and understand some of the problems that causes.
God’s peace and grace, sister.
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Thanks so much for the sweet comment! I deeply appreciate your prayers for me and my husband! Poor guy is exhausted!
I’m sorry you have dry mouth….it’s not fun. π Much love and many prayers!ππ€
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Aww, thanks so much for your prayers, too! π
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You’re very welcome!β€
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